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Surviving such differences and changes

Posted By Dennelton Mandiau on Wednesday, July 29, 2015 | 23:49


Q: My boyfriend and I plan to stay together while I continue my studies and he with his work in the city.

His parents and mine have agreed to our plans and given their blessings. We are looking forward to a future with each other.

But now I have begun to wonder. We are actually two very different persons --- both education wise and lifestyle.

He is from a simple, old-fashioned family. Even though he is an SPM holder, he can’t speak, read or write in other languages, except his mother tongue.

I am English-educated and my family is of a higher standard.

So far, I don’t mind this but will those differences affect us later? I can feel that he is sad while I can speak English fluently and he can’t.

But we do love each other deeply. I am 17.

Unsure

A: You know even though you may have it all, doubts have crept in. That makes you wonder if love is so perfect after all.

The point is you may feel that he is the best guy in the world for you, but you are only all of 17.

You must know you are growing up fast and maturing emotionally and intellectually. You are getting more aware of the differences between you and your boyfriend.

You sensed his sadness when he couldn’t understand a word you are saying. Would you feel embarrassed at his loss for words with your circle of friends?

Until you realize there is a gap that may widen more as you enter the next phase of your life, love is still sweet and tender.

Later you will complete your tertiary studies, get a better job and earn more than him.

So, will you then resent him for being what he is while you have changed and become “better”?

Some relationships can survive such differences and changes well, provided both parties accept the compromises that must be made.

Love that is strong and resilient can bridge the gap.

But it is not going to be easy, since both of you must be honest, communicate and be sensitive to each other’s moods and needs.

If you are unsure, as you are now, you should allow yourself the chance to know a few more fellows before you make up your mind.

Do not pressure yourself to accept love out of pity or obligation. You need to be honest when it comes to love.

Agony Aunt
So You Think You Have Problems --- Christine Vu
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The Editor

I'm Dennelton from Sabah, editor of www.tvokm.com. I was a blogger since 2008, I have a great interest about blogging and seeking additional income through the internet. Follow me with like our official Facebook Page HERE

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